DATELINE NOV 2007: Harley-Davidson lets members of the Australasian press corps loose on Buell XB12X Ulysses in Far North Queensland. Three unforgettable days ensue.
Poor Co-pilot, she's so stoic.
When 'The Ed' (KR Editor McKay) rang with the news that I was to be dispatched to the ‘2007 Buell Ulysses and SuperTT Ride Adventure’ in Far North Queensland – AKA ‘Crocodile country’ - her misery began.
The news of my impending departure on the three-day ride from Cairns to Cooktown, and beyond to Cape Melville, was relayed to her interspersed with bad, lame Crocodile Dundee impersonations.
‘The Funnel web spider can kill a man in eight seconds, just by lookin' at him.’
‘Oh no, you can't take my photograph - you got the lens-cap on.’
‘That’s not a bottle opener … THIS …. ’ etc etc etc.
Then when I mentioned that the ride was through some of the most spectacular World Heritage-listed areas on the mainland … on the motorcycle that is our current joint favourite … it’s to her enormous credit that she even bothered to pick me up at the airport on the way home.
Most of my friends just said ‘b*stard!’ and changed topics.
From my chair however, the whole thing was rather amazing.
You couldn’t buy the time I had.
“Nah — that’s not a ride. THIS is a ride...”
It starts in a Sydney office
This story has its beginning when H-D decided to get their updated-for-2007 Buell ADV bike better Press coverage - or 'more ink'.
Whether it was in response to some of the lukewarm reviews the bike received originally, or if it was just to tickle sales interest – whatever the motivation, H-D Aus put together a text-book media-ride event.
Representatives of the region’s motorcycle publications were there – both print and electronic media. Esteemed editors, subs, journos and columnists. And yours truly, a native in my native land, emblazoned with the Kiwi Rider Magazine Logo.
The starters list read: 'The Press' x 7 – all on ’07 Buell XB12X Ulysses, Paul from H-D/Buell Aus leading the expedition on a Lightning Super TT, along with professional guide Jason on another Ulysses, 2 x 4wd support vehicles carrying ride Co-ordinator Kim and Chris from H-D, lens man Lou Martin, PR guy Richard, and Warwick - whose ‘Stay upright’ resources were employed throughout.
North From Cairns
After a ride briefing and some test riding around the carpark cones (for those unfamiliar with the machine), we set off from Cairns depot around 9am on Tuesday morning. Heading North.
Our bags and equipment were securely stowed in the Land Cruiser, we had full backup, a factory mechanic and support crew, maximum temperatures hovering around 29°C, with minimums at a mild 21°C, partly cloudy, the azure waters of the Great Barrier Reef away on our right - and the Daintree rain forest in our immediate future.
All on a fleet of fabulous, brand new Buells. You can probably imagine it was a happy bunch. Even the chorus of that many noisy cooling fans operating together was a hoot!
Cairns is the gateway to the reef and is a tourist town where most of the attractions are out of town.
Big time hotels that are mostly self-contained worlds unto themselves provide overnighters for the tourists transiting to the Reef or the Outback.
A night on the top floor at the Rydges was a nice way to prepare for the ride.
The roads around Cairns however, have a decidedly motorcycle flavour.
The Captain Cook Highway north to Port Douglas threads its way through the World Heritage-listed Wet Tropics, with rainforest on one side and the Coral Sea on the other.
There was some traffic, but we got clear sections of highway too, where the Buells hammered through some great sports-bike roads along the beach and hills.
Suspensions and set-ups had all been tuned to our individual heights and weights (supplied prior to the event) so Jason set a cracking pace and we really carved it up - with relish.
Into the Daintree Forest
A regroup at Mossman and the first off-road sections greeted us after we crossed the Daintree River Ferry.
Paul and his crew dropped tyre pressures down to the mid 20’s and backed off the suspension damping several notches - while we ate lunch at the Beach Resort - the one set in the Jungle.
Yup. Riding in a paradise and the factory man is tuning my bike.
And so it was on into the unsealed wilds.
"Beware of the ‘cutty vines' overhanging the road – they can pull you off the bike," began Jason’s pre-jungle ride briefing.
It turned out that most are high enough not to be an issue, though some did require navigation. Wild pigs, huge Cassowary, Wallaby and Snakes are other hazards he warned us to allow for as we headed deep into the jungle’s mountain trails – and we were still traveling at a pretty fair clip.
The smell of the Eucalypts! Who'd be in a car!
The road through the forest presented numerous water crossings - with two that we had to walk the bikes across. The gibber rocks below were just too unstable and treacherous to ride on.
I was glad it appears that the back wheel spinning up a roost works as a Crocodile repellent as we pushed the bikes across a wide waterway.
Well, that's what I was thinking as I was slipping and sliding all over the loose creek bed, thigh-deep, in my leathers and Johnny Rebs - and was in no mood for wrestling errant reptiles!
The gear only took a few minutes to dry in the conditions anyway – which was good – because water crossings were a constant feature of the ride. Bridges up this way are an occasional luxury, but the Buells really did handle it all quite easily.
So it was for most of the way up to Cooktown, rainforest trails, valley floor, concrete dual track, fast bitumen, and dirt in various sections.
We had time for a Lemon squash at the ‘Lions Den’ Pub at Rossville, to wash away the dust and marvel at the large arachnid collection in jars lining the pub corridors - all of which had been caught in the pub!
Then it was on again all the way to Cooktown.
Cooktown
We arrived in Cooktown late in the afternoon and rode straight to the nearby lookout for a photo stop and view over the town and Endeavour River valley.
Then we made our way into town, re-inflated tyres and stiffened suspension for the 80km of bitumen coming up next morning.
After those adjustments and some further fine-tuning, we checked in to a very pleasant Resort in what is a surprisingly small country town.
A subsequent beer underneath the swaying palms around the pool saw us all impressed with the first day on tour, and the bike. (I mean, I OWN one!)
We had covered Sports bike roads, dusty mountain trails, creeks and dense jungle – and the bikes had not missed a beat.
‘Tomorrow it opens out and gets a lot quicker,' was Jason’s briefing as his pre-ride advice continued prior to a sumptuous feed of Barramundi.
Some good yarns were exchanged and a relatively early night under the air conditioner followed.
Hugely satisfied.
Day 2 - Red Dirt Country
An early start saw us crossing Black Mountain and the Great Dividing Range before heading into the Mulga scrub.
The 80km to Lakeland rolled away quickly as we passed epic volcanic formations with boulders the size of small houses, all piled into improbable mountains, like stacks of pebbles.
Then just beyond the junction at Lakeland the red dust starts and suddenly it feels very 'Capital-O' Outback.
We started travelling half a kilometre or more apart as we headed out onto the plains.
It was mainly flat and fast.
Speeds nudged up and up on the dirt sections as we became more confident with the machines.
For an all-rounder that does as many things as well as it does, The Buell's dirt manners are surprisingly good. It's no 21" front-wheel, knobby-clad big trail bike by any means, but it gets along just fine on the hard-pack.
The convoy sprawled along and the ‘red-out’ plumes of dust wafted across a seemingly endless landscape.
Visibility behind was sometimes nil, in the clouds of red and white dust, then occasionally everything disappeared forward as well, in the choke from passing road trains. Due caution.
The long straights are broken by gently flowing streams and creeks – and the need to be alert, ready to wash off speed in a hurry for upcoming hard-to-see culverts, floodways and the roaming Brahma bulls - all added an edge.
So does the bull dust. No, not what you hear from me at the pub, the fine dust that collects in the potholes and dips and corrugations of the red clay base.
Zooming along on hard-pack one minute, then suddenly big patches of soft, almost invisible fine dust, with a hard edge on the other side appear.
It sure keeps you on your toes, and the bikes wash off speed well-enough when you do see the bad sections upcoming, but what great fun, and the bikes … they handled it all very nicely thank you, that radial front brake is OK.
Then there's my lame powerslides through the 120kph (shhh!) sweepers. (Fortunately not photographed.)
Climbing down to the watercourses, splashing through the creeks and then absolutely nailing it back up to the plains was exhilarating.
Plumes of dust and water, charging through the floodways, sand patches and loose surfaces, kilometre after kilometre into the relative emptiness. The termite mounds, swamps, punctuated by the fuel or drink stops at far-flung roadhouses like Laura and Hann River, passing 4wds and the occasional Road Train. What a blast.
Outstanding, good, clean, dirty, fun until the turnoff at Musgrave roadhouse and even more clay and sand till we arrived at our ‘Oasis’ - the fabulous Lotusbird Lodge.
Powerslides through the 120km/h sweepers. Huge plumes of dust and water. Good, clean, dirty fun.
Lotus Bird Lodge
The Lodge is quite amazing. With the possible exception of the Nullabor Plain, it’s about as ‘far-away-from-it-all’ as I’ve ever been. Yet it features nice cabins perched by a beautiful Billabong and is home to an amazing array of animals – crocodiles included. ‘But he’s over in the next lagoon’, Garry, our Host, informed us.
Over a beer before dinner the other journos started asking ME questions about the bike. Some even had the same chin-scratching 'what-do-we-have-here?' look that I did, when I first tested Auckland Motorcycle's demo 18 months ago.
We had plenty of time to further discuss it.
A sumptuous meal followed in the open-air central hut. The menu was varied and included local dishes, then Gary put on a floor show where he read some delightful bush poetry, and a tasty bottle of red (or three) saw a pretty happy corps off to their cots and grinning famously.
Day 3 - The Return Leg
I got up before the dawn and perched as close as was practical (safe?) to the edge of the Billabong – it was only 'Crocodile Dundee' IMPERSONATIONS.
I marvelled at the outback colours, the birds and the place. As the sun rose I banged off exposures on the tripod I’d just lugged 3,000km (for basically no reason!)
A surprising number of the lads came out to join me. Mostly silent, drinking it in.
Another hearty bush breakfast followed, and all too soon (I could have stayed a week) we were back on the gun-barrel straight red dust all the way back to Lakeland.
It was still enormous fun – and I was getting better at it.
Slipping and sliding occasionally and working on what Warwick and Paul had been coaching me about rear rear-wheel steering and keeping the front end light.
The Buells soaked up the distance in great comfort and we had rolled back to the sealed roads – and time to re-inflate the tyres and stiffen the suspension for more high-speed stuff through the mulga to the Great Divide.
More photo calls, and the excellent sports-bike roads on the descent of the Rex Range north of Cairns followed.
I was tacked on at the back of the quicks, and there was a serious avalanche a-comin’ down that mountain as we made our way to the coast - rapidly.
Beautiful sports-bike roads, and there aren’t many better bikes for flicking from side to side down a twisty mountain tarmac than a Buell.
Any of the 16" front wheel's shortcomings off-road are more than compensated for by its on-road handling and cornering abilities.
Now I may have said this before … but they handled it superbly.
A final blast along the Cook Highway with one more photo call for some group shots - to remember a pretty special event by, the bikes returned to the depot, and the top floor of the Rydges Hotel beckoned once again.
The lodgings seemed inappropriate for one so red dust caked and road grimy as me, so I jumped in the shower with my leathers still on, before getting cleaned up for the farewell dinner and debrief.
The Verdict
What an event. We were presented with an opportunity to ride the adventure sport machines through every type of conditions they are designed to accommodate. Every type of road and track and really, the bikes absolutely nailed it.
10 of them did 1,000km in sometimes torturous conditions and the only issue was a drowned wiring connection on one of the TT’s - that Paul fixed on the fly. The Ulysses didn’t miss a beat, no belt dramas … no dramas, they proved versatile, capable and great fun.
The Buell team produced an incredible event, the bikes performed superbly, all the journos I had discussions with were very favourably impressed and will knock out good ink.
Small Fish - Small Pond
Even after showering in my leathers they still had a coating of red dust in the seams, and I was a bit concerned about returning to NZ in them (pretty much all I had apart from shorts, tee, toothbrush, cameras and a dang tripod).
I need not have worried. As I approached the counter at Auckland Airport, the Bio Security Office saw the helmet, looked at my declarations and said, 'Big Dave, where have you been riding now?' And I told an avid Kiwi Rider Magazine subscriber a brief tale of the exploit as he waved me on.
I went and bought proper ADV gear soon after.
Overall it was a case of objective achieved, knowledge gained, and most importantly, the rightfully-disappointed not to have been invited Co-pilot was still talking to me on the drive home.
And I didn't mention Crocodile Dundee again.
The Bike
The XB12X Ulysses finally got a launch that showed what it could really do.
The Roads
Coastal highway, rainforest trail, creek crossing, bull dust and fast red dirt.
The Result
A thousand kilometres, no drama, and a very favourable press corps.
Fast Facts
- Motorcycle: 2007 Buell XB12X Ulysses
- Location: Far North Queensland, Australia
- Stops: Cairns, Port Douglas, Daintree, Cooktown, Lakeland, Musgrave, Lotus Bird Lodge and return
- Distance: Approximately 1,000km
- Terrain: Coastal highway, rainforest trails, dirt roads, creek crossings, bull dust and red clay
- Conditions: Warm, mostly fine, 21–29°C
- Host: Harley-Davidson / Buell Australia
- Support: Stay Upright rider training and support crew
- Originally published: Kiwi Rider, 2007